想轉組的人，最難的不是面試，是那段還沒確定的日子

最近我在公司要換座位了，而且是換到很左邊的位置。老實說，這種事情看起來很小，可是真的發生在自己身上的時候，心裡還是會想很多。

我本來就有在想轉組。不是一時衝動，也不是跟誰鬧翻，而是做了一段時間之後，慢慢發現自己現在這個位置，壓力有，責任有，可是成就感卻越來越少。尤其是當一些重要的東西卡住、案子沒有真正往前走、又一陣子沒有新 project 的時候，那種感覺很難形容。不是完全做不下去，而是會開始懷疑，自己這樣一直待下去，還有沒有意思。

最近新的組別老闆要跟我 interview。聽到這件事的時候，我第一個反應不是興奮，反而有點複雜。

一方面，我會覺得，喔，原來這件事情不是我自己想想而已，是真的有在動。可是另一方面，我也知道，只要還沒正式確定，一切都還在半空中。這種感覺很像站在兩個地方中間，舊的位置還沒完全離開，新的地方也還沒真正站上去。

我覺得想轉組的人，最難的地方其實不是 interview 本身。真正難的是那一段「還沒確定」的日子。

你還是要正常上班，正常開會，正常回 email。你也不能表現得太明顯，不能太早把話說死。表面上看起來一切如常，心裡卻已經開始在想：如果成了，接下來要怎麼走？如果沒成，是不是還得回到原來的位置，假裝什麼都沒發生？

這種過渡期，外人不一定看得出來，但自己很清楚。尤其像我最近連座位都要換了，就更容易讓人把很多事情連在一起想。到底這是好事，還是不好？是被重新安排，還是被邊緣化？是為了未來鋪路，還是只是剛好而已？

有趣的是，這幾天我剛好在 YouTube 上看拔河比賽。一開始只是隨便看，後來越看越有意思。贏的那一隊，不見得是某一個人特別有力，而是整隊的節奏很一致。大家一起往後，一起出力，像蜈蚣一樣。反而如果每個人都有自己的節奏，再有力都不一定贏。

我突然覺得，職場好像也是這樣。有時候不是你不努力，也不是你不夠會做，而是你待在一個不太對的節奏裡面。你一個人很想往前，整個局卻沒有真的動起來。久了，力氣還在，心卻先累了。

所以我現在對這次 interview 的想法，反而比以前平靜一點。我當然希望能轉成。可是我也知道，現在最重要的不是先替自己下結論，而是把這一步走好。

如果真的有適合的位置，那就往前走。如果最後沒有成，那至少我已經開始正視自己的感受，而不是繼續用「再忍一下」來敷衍自己。

很多時候，人生不是在某一天突然改變的。而是在你開始承認：「我現在這個位置，好像真的不太適合我了。」那一刻，改變就已經開始了。

而想轉組的人，最難的，也不是面試。是那段還沒確定的日子裡，你要一邊穩住自己，一邊默默準備，等那個真正可以換位置的時機到來。

For Anyone Thinking About an Internal Transfer, the Hardest Part Is the Waiting Before It’s Official

Recently, I found out that I would be moving to a new seat at work, all the way to the far left side of the office. It may sound like a small thing, but when it happens to you, it can stir up more feelings than you expect.

I had already been thinking about transferring to another team. It was not an impulsive decision, and it was not because of a conflict with anyone. It was more like a quiet realization that built up over time. I started to feel that although the pressure and responsibilities were still there, the sense of accomplishment was fading. When important items get stuck, projects stop moving forward, and there have not been many new opportunities for a while, it creates a strange kind of frustration. It is not that I cannot keep going. It is that I start to wonder how long I should keep staying in a role that no longer feels rewarding.

Recently, I learned that the manager of the new team will be interviewing me. When I heard that, my first reaction was not pure excitement. It was more complicated than that.

On one hand, I felt relieved that this was no longer just an idea in my own head. Something was actually happening. On the other hand, I also knew that until anything becomes official, everything is still floating in the air. It feels like standing between two places. I have not fully left my current position, but I am not yet part of the new one either.

I have come to realize that for anyone considering an internal transfer, the hardest part is often not the interview itself. The hardest part is the period before anything is confirmed.

You still have to show up to work, attend meetings, answer emails, and act as if everything is normal. At the same time, you cannot be too obvious, and you cannot say too much too early. Outwardly, life looks the same. Inwardly, your mind is already running ahead. If it works out, what happens next? If it does not, do you simply return to your original role and act as if none of this ever happened?

This kind of in-between stage is not always visible to other people, but you feel it deeply yourself. In my case, even a seat change started to feel symbolic. Was it a good sign or a bad one? Was I being repositioned, pushed aside, or simply moved for practical reasons? Was it part of a transition, or was I just reading too much into it?

Interestingly, around the same time, I found myself watching tug-of-war videos on YouTube. At first it was just casual watching, but then I started noticing something. The winning team was not necessarily the one with the single strongest person. The winning team was the one that moved together. Their timing was aligned. They leaned back together, stepped together, and pulled together like a centipede moving in rhythm. If everyone had their own timing, even strong individuals could still lose.

That made me think about work. Sometimes it is not that you are not working hard enough. Sometimes it is not that you are not capable. Sometimes you are simply in a rhythm that no longer fits you. You may be trying your best to move forward, but the larger situation around you is not moving with you. Over time, your strength may still be there, but your heart gets tired first.

That is why I now feel calmer about this interview than I expected. Of course I hope the transfer works out. But I also know that the most important thing right now is not to rush to conclusions. The most important thing is to handle this step well.

If there is truly a role that fits me better, then I should move forward. If it does not happen, then at least I have already started being honest with myself instead of continuing to say, “Just hold on a little longer.”

Many life changes do not begin on the day something official happens. They begin the moment you admit to yourself, quietly and truthfully, that your current place no longer feels right.

And for anyone thinking about an internal transfer, the hardest part is often not the interview. It is the waiting before anything is official — the period where you must stay steady, stay professional, and quietly prepare for a change that may already have begun inside you.